Tuesday, January 29, 2008

The mistake

Once again Ralph was blowing the conch. The conch, the thing that signifies our unity as a group. Yet, I don't even know if Ralph is a true friend. He disregarded my feelings and told everyone my name was Piggy. He also uses my ideas and takes credit for them. That's not what I call a friend. Just then my thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Ralph's voice. He was talking about there hunt and how they were going to use the conch shell as a sign of who was going to talk. There were also going to be more rules now, so we have more order. Then the crowd pushed a little boy to the front of the crowd, he was trying to say something with the conch but everyone was making fun of him. So using my nimble mind, I went up to that innocent boy and told everyone what he was trying to say. He said he saw a beastie in the jungle, a snake thing. Most people didn't believe what he said and Ralph moved on to talk about making a signal so ships or planes would find us. He said we should make a fire and at that everyone went running off like kids. Even Ralph left dropping the conch for the irresistible urge to defy our laws and just go start a fire like wild men. I was left alone with the conch to go and try to stop their childish antics. Of course, no one will listen to me. They never listen to reason.
Once I got to the top of the hill, there was a pile of wood but they were all puzzled over how to start the fire. Then Jack thought of using my glasses and officiously took them. Then Ralph took my glasses from Jack and started the fire. Ralph then gave me my specs back. I tried to tell them it was no use trying to keep that fire going and to control it but they wouldn't listen. Jack just kept telling me to shut up and I would just stare scornfully at that arrogant jerk. Then, the fire warped into a fiery monster and was going to burn down the whole jungle. Then a tree exploded and a tumult of huge snakes scattered across the jungle. All I was thinking at the time was that all the boys got what they deserved, the consequence of not thinking things out. I look around for the boy who first mentioned the snake he saw to see if I could comfort him if he was scared. I couldn't see him. Where's that little 'un?

4 comments:

Gala said...

Hey. I like the way you used the words in your sentences.
For Example,
"Even Ralph left dropping the conch for the irresistible urge to defy our laws and just go start a fire like wild men."
I like this sentence because it is very detailed.

Emma Christenfeld said...

Maya-
Can you fix a few things like some spelling? Great blog, really descriptive.
-Emma

Mr. Shaddox said...

Maya,

Well written. I enjoyed learning more about Piggy's perspective of the chapter's events.

REVISION:

GRAMMAR: Examine the following sentences for errors and rewrite them.

1) He also uses my ideas and credit for them. Thats not what I call a friend.

2) I was left alone with the conch to go and try to stop there childish antics, of course no one will listen to me.


REPETITION: Think of a creative way to minimize the number of times you use the word "glasses" in the following sentence.

3) Then Jack thought of using my glasses and officiously took my glasses. Then Ralph took my glasses from Jack and started the fire. Ralph then gave me my glasses back.

Maya said...

Mr. Shaddox,
Here are my revisions.
He also uses my ideas and takes credit for them. That's not what I call a friend.
I was left alone with the conch to go and try to stop their childish antics. Of course, no one will listen to me.
Then Jack thought of using my glasses and officiously took them. Then Ralph took my glasses from Jack and started the fire. Ralph then gave me my specs back.